Screwed.edu
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
