Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
the condom got lost in my hair
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret