Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
