Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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