i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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