he thought i was a dude.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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