he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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