How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize