it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
