I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize