Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
