let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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