And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
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