She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize
