I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
