hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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