I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
