Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize