dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
