I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize