Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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