He is such a slut. More and more my type.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize