dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize