Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
it's like heaven, but drunker
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Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
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Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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