Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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