i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
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I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka