Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
