can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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