Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
