i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
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