some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
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I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
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i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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