She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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