I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I love how my cats smell like pot.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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