Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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