If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
