you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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