Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
