i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
