why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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