Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
If that was your dad, he is hot
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
