how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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