A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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