After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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