Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I touched a dick in church today
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
