Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
