Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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