And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
