He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
