my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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