just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize