he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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