I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
